ok, I can see why an n would want to stay married long after its over cause he wants to keep owning his wife forever plus divorce would make him look bad. I can think of financial reasons, supply reasons and social reasons for a n not to get a divorce. What I don't understand is why the other partner never bothers getting a divorce. In my travels being drawn to emotionally unavailable men, I've met many who claim they are divorced only to learn after asking the right questions that they are only separated. Thing is they have been separated for years( like 5,10,15). Even my own mother never bothers getting divorced from n father. Why do people stay " separated ". If the reason is for the sake of the kids then how does it make any difference if The parents don't live together anyway. I don't understand this behavior. From a narcissist I can think of reasons but from the partner, I just don't get it. Assuming of course it's not financial reasons. I just don't get it. I have friends who will date a separated man, I will not. Not a passing judgement call, I'm just not up for drama of it.