I chose my name from the phrase "Like a moth to a flame"... meaning = being irresistibly and dangerously attracted to something or someone.

Being attracted to someone who can kill me emotionally.

Going forward, I'd like to notice the flame, take it in and not have a desire to move closer to it. LOL

My x sometimes called me sunshine( insert suffix of cuteness from his language on the end of it. )He was always walking on me " walkingonsunshine" Somewhere along my path of healing I took back my power and put the focus on me and now I am the focus of my name not him. Now I ( me) not a dumb girl named sunshine, but. Me.. I am walking on sunshine as in feeling alive and with the power of the sun at my feet in a path of light. I didn't have to change my name... Just changed my perception!

My avatar is of beautiful butterflies in my favorite color! They represent how I want to see myself, beautiful and free, free to fly.
My kitchen is now plastered with butterflies to remind me every day!

I chose a picture of myself, because well, I just love me.

.... just means freedom from all restrains to me.

My name falling forward.....

I knew that I felt that I was falling, but if I was going to fall I was going face forward. I knew that I could stop myself with my arms (my spirit), as oppose to falling backwards with nothing to support or stop the fall.

Great thread, it's been fun reading all of them.

hugs
ff

I loved reading this thread! Thanks to everyone who added to it. I don't want it to end, so, if you're reading this and you haven't contributed, please do!

I just took down my HUGE picutre that was above my couch of Waterhouse's painting of Ech and narc, ITS TIME, it no longer symbolizes anything in my life now - it is good that you left Echo out of the picture because she really was never in the picture to begin with lol You have something in the end echo lost, you have your voice and the ability to express what narc did to you and you have been heard. I love Waterhouse's other drawings I just purchased one entitled The Rose Garden - much rather would look at a picture of things growing than an individual that is DEAD. Its hard for me to imagine now as I look back that I was once echo pining over a psychopath wondering why he didnt love me, - I think I should have hung a picture from the movie "Psycho" over my couch because that was how truly disturbed he was - but there would have been too many questions why I had Anthony Perkins in my living room - sorry I didnt really answer your post on the sig of my Avatar - I guess I have always called myself "Neverlookback" because this was said to me at least 50 times when I was seeking counseling for this trauma, "when you reach the point of no return, NEVER GO BACK, EVER, you extract him from your life like a plague" because that is what he was.

My picture is b/c its the only non personal I have on my computer, as I am not a computer geek I have no idea how to get the GREAT PICS everyone else gets[I have tried and tried...
My User name, now that I did pick with CARE....after coming here and knowing I was going to get away and stay away from both exns......I then picked the name *USED* for the women I *USED* to be, and never will be again....

Layla i love your pic... excellent choice

One slight meaning that my name has is that its the name he used in playful texts to me and another girl he was pursuing, and when i read THAT text to her, it broke my heart and at least 'started' to break the spell.. so each and every time i log in i get a little painful reminder why i shouldnt call/pick-up/text/email/meet :-s HIM!

other than that its just anonymous and unidentifying, just in case.... but thats another story

the pic represents how i feel after he sliced and diced my heart and half my sanity! (gaslighting anyone) Like he had dissected me and extracted what he wanted and basically left me feeling like a prize butt(head)

******************** DISCLAIMER *******************
HAHA look at me talking in the past tense as if i've even achieved NC, I'm embarrassed to say i'm not there yet, just had to add that truth bomb so that i can post in honesty through this hard HARD process

TRUTH and light and the search for it.I want to know..Through God and those he speaks to... Many of them are right here on this site.

I was told by my exN/P's therapist on my last visit with them , while I was in tears and shock...She said "You'll have to assume that everything he EVER told you was a LIE". I said ...the entire relationship? She said "yes". I was rocked to the core.. NOTHING was Real? NOTHING? 21 years of my life...meant nothing?My life with him flashed before my eyes...Dating, his childhood, his compliments,holidays, strange intimate moments and on and on.

I've been searching for the TRUTH ever since.Facing it is the hard part.I'd never known such evil as my ex N/P. I value the truth and those that tell it more than anything now.

As for my avatar, I lost all my friends to the N/P and his money.My family is full of disordered ones...so I'm on my own. Just me searching for TRUTH and light.

I love this place.

mine is just a whimsical kind of woman...and she's wearing a head set...she can't hear anything happening around her. :=P

she's also on the beach, and i like the ocean, so the whole picture sort of captures an essence of whimsical-ness that i used to have, and would very much like to try to travel back to. i lost that along the way, from dating back to back, two narcs over the past two years. :(

but, she's coming back. slowly, but surely. ;)

great thread you've started!

This is the most powerful image I've ever found for a Sagitarius woman. Perfect in her beauty, fierce in her eyes, with her archer bow ready for battle. I have been through a battle... and I won the right to be myself, in all my Sagitarian Warrior Princess glory.

is because whenever i think of the exN, all i want to do is hurl. so disgusting the way that he treated me (and everyone else!), blech. i also find the barfing pumpkins really amusing whenever i see one & i wanted an avatar that would make me smile whenenver i post, which it does :)

as for my handle, i wanted to choose something that would remind me that, as horrible as it is to survive a N, there is lots of value in the lesson(s) i was forced to learn (& continue to employ in my life today). i wanted something that would show my strength & that i am moving on, better armed & educated than i was when i first met that asshat & got sucked into his vortex of evil.

This drawing was given to me as an illustration of a Shakespeare sonnet. The person knew nothing of the N and this situation, but it was very much about one person sacrificing their happiness to the whims of another. Reading it made me feel kind of sick and sad that I'd devoted myself to such a horrible person like this.

The drawing seemed apt as it shows someone clinging onto the dark chess king, yet holding a mask in her hand, as though she has just pulled off his mask. The white knight and bird at the window seem to suggest hope and possibilities for the future as the girl steps away from the dark figure.

No reasoning behind my user name, I use that elsewhere and was the only one i could think of when i registered here.
But my picture, well now, I have that picture on a canvas in my home, and if it were really possible to have a tattoo on your tongue, it made me think that ALL NARCS should have a compulsory one on theirs saying something like 'every word this tongue helps form is a lie' or just plain and simple 'im the devil in disguise' lol, silly I know but that was my thinking behind it back in my messed up toad days!!
xx