Mirrorme's Story

How do I get away

I'm a 37 year old mother of 3 ...I've been with my narc for the past two years... We began our relationship as an affair( nothing I'm proud of and have a tremendous amount of guilt over) he left his 16 year marriage for me.. And believ u me I hear about it every time we get in a fight...I hear how he could make a 16 year marriage work...he knows what it takes..I think now that the reason his marriage went on for that long was because she made it work she never questioned anything he did he went on trips with friends and rarely took her... Th other day he and I got in a fight and I made the horrible mistake of "questioning" him he screamed and yelled told me I'm gonna learn now that I WILL not ride his a$$ and I will NOT question him...his word is his word and I better learn now...after all he was able to make a 16 yr marriage work...he gets so mad at me and I do fight back ... Well I use to fight back and say what I thought now I've learned I don't say what I really think even though he tells me to say what's on my mind tell him my real thoughts..if I did this he would think more of me.. But when I did say what I really thought I was beat down called a whore berated ..I dont know what to do...I can't do anything right... It's like he hates everything about me...