In dealing with my Ex-Narc (before I knew he was a Narc) and his weird entourage, I kept on saying to myself: "They're acting like a bunch of addicts!"
I thought that on so many occasions- their behavior was just that 'off'. Later, when Robo-Boy's mask cracked and I learned more about PD's, my good friend shed light on what I was experiencing. She calls narcissism: The King of Addictions.
Isn't THAT the truth? Narcs are so consumed with keeping up their image, so addicted to their mind games and role of puppet master to everyone in their lives. So stuck on themselves- on their beauty and perceived perfection. And then, of course, is their insatiable lust for ATTENTION- for SUPPLY- their drug of choice.
Many NarcoPaths are also poly-addicted. They often supplement their Supply needs with a sexual addiction and/or a substance abuse problem- sometimes they are gamblers and over-spenders.
Anyway, thanks for all you've said, d.talks- especially that you have battled your own demons and emerged a better, more spiritual person. You wrote:
"it's no wonder the narcopaths (love that term!) all lack (true) spirituality (although, as NMAE seems to have experienced, some of them really put on a good show). i mean, look at what it entails:
"humbling yourself to the reality of a much greater, higher power than yourself. (humility--'nuff said!)
-relinquishing control (for a narc, terrifying!!)
-accepting our own flaws and others'. (requires insight & compassion)
-honesty and vigilance
-service to others"
Yes, as we've been saying, NarcoPaths don't change because they see no flaws in themselves- only in others. Everything you mentioned is crucial to personal growth and change. The NarcoPath lacks true self awareness- though I believe he has moments of clarity- then it's back to drowning himself in Supply and other mood altering behaviors.
The Disordered One needs to first get off his throne, relinquish his delusions of grandeur/control and find some humility. And honesty? Nearly impossible!
I KNOW in my heart that personality disorders are not simply a mental and emotional problem- but also a deep spiritual lack, as well. And I keep saying that I'll start a new thread with that topic. And I will, but first I have to really gel some of the ideas I've been mulling over for a very long time.
I also became aware that when I danced with the devil, he didn't have a gun to my head. Examining the part that I played in all this craziness has been really enlightening- and also scarey!
More on that later- for sure. And thanks so much for everyone's insights!