I saw my therapist yesterday... and he says I look the calmest he's ever seen me! And he's been seeing me since 2006 so that says alot about the changes I've made in my life and I did feel very good about myself when he noticed that about me.

Yes,... big day, but since I had counceling yesterday I'm feeling a lot less anxious.

To answer the question... do I trust men? I've decided NOT to allow my experience to cloud my outlook on others so rather than say whether I do or don't trust men... I think the key is that I trust ME. I trust that if or when I see a red flag... I will pay attention, I trust that if or when someone speak to me or treats me in a diminishing way I will pay attention, I trust that if or when a man lies to me.. I will call it a day and trust that I will NOT make excuses for it as I've done in the past. And I have to say... trusting myself feels amazingly good.

As for my new fella... so far he has some very great qualities. He is in my age rage, he is kind and honest, he has worked the same job for 11 years and had his own business before that. We are very like minded.. and our personalities seem very well suited to each other. He takes care of him self, but not obsessively so, he is good looking in my eyes... but not "too good looking" .. (I'm sure you know what I mean.) So far, we seem to be very well matched and have about the same type of life experiences. I make sure I am not "feeding" him information about me but rather, I ask the questions of him first and simply listen to his answers... this way I can be a little more sure he isn't just mirroring me.

I will keep you posted after Monday's hearing. I just don't want to hear any negative garbage from the ex. But I am expecting it.