Thanks BtrflyGrl for your candor and it was exactly that point I was trying to make.

When wondering whether to leave your cheating partner or breaking NC with a cheating partner, you are potentially putting yourself at risk of getting any STD even if being responsible and using condoms (clearly condoms help enormously with all the big STDs and should still be used to help prevent Herpes and HPV).

With your comment and no offense meant, it goes to show a little of the aftermath you have to deal with as a consequence and therefore to take it into serious consideration.

My post was aiming to raise awareness and help to prevent any unnecessary problems for others in the future.

Hugs

Thanks gottagetoverit for your kind words, and also for sharing, it's not easy and I can totally understand where you were at.. it makes us a bit more vulnerable again, as any man who might accept us like that we may be grateful for. It is what you say, a case of buildig ourselves up again after this still believing we deserve a lot better.

I had meant to also say, that of course there's a whole list of other serious STDs - syphillus, gonorrhea, HIV etc out there and yes, thank God I didn't get those but clearly be aware!

My point was that if you are unlucky, even using condoms and being responsible you can still catch a couple of STDs.

Thanks for the tip on Valtrex, at the moment I'm using Dymoclear tablets if I'm under the weather for prevention which has been brilliat.. also good for those who have cold sores!

I've been involved with 3 Ps, all a little different. It wasn't immediately obvious with the first two until I was suckered in.

My barriers are so high up at the moment and I too have great difficulty in trusting again. If it means I miss out on having a family,in order to wait and find a good man, then I guess that's meant. In the meantime, I'm working on myself. I absolutely dread having to tell someone, but it's the only honest thing to do.

The narc or P bug is a very rotten bug but the good news is that it is curable! It can be a tough path to walk, lots of love and kindness for oneself, lots of reading, TIME and re-establishing or building the boundaries that we need to protect ourselves and give us confidence to go forth.

Thanks so much again for your support. Hang in there, you will get free of these narcs, sending you a big hug
x

gritty details...DON'T READ IF SQUIMISH

Yes, you can get herpes type 1 down there... my ex, all of a sudden seemed to know so much about it (ass)... he said I would only get it back on my mouth... touch wood and with the help of a lot of immune support tablets I'm 18 months clear and no re-occurence. The first bout is very painful, you won't miss it.

You can also get herpes type 2 (genital) around your mouth I believe, although a lot less likely, worth a check.

As it was type 1 down there, I thought it may have been easier to explain to someone else and more accidental as I thought it had been... until I got the second STD.

The second STD was genital warts... lovely... I do sometimes manage to pluck up some humor and say a new man will have to accept me warts and all... a case of laughing, crying and then laughing again...well hey...

With the lovely genital warts, they can range from being skin tags to other bigger warts, mine luckily weren't the later... but with all the crap I went through and the depression of getting a second STD my immune system crashed and I got a bad bout.

They treat it cryogenically, liquid nitrogen basically... at -321F (-196c), it's really cold and burns off the cells. Around those sensitive parts, it can be extremely painful, more so each week... frankly, and I'm no wimp, agonising after two months.

Did I hate him then... you betcha I did. I actually cried after 10 weeks treatment and asked them to stop which was just as well as the skin tissue was so damaged by the treatment I had to move onto the ointment for 3 weeks which finally finished it.

Neither are curable, you have them for life. You can pass them on even with no symptoms, although slightly less likely. With Genital Warts, they do say that there may be a chance that the virus may disappear after two years... I'm keeping everything crossed! Trying to eat healthier (I always did but much more superfoods), excercise...next is giving up cigarettes.. that's a tough one.

Yes, of course, no worries
x

Hi MissScout, I have followed your posts and my thoughts are with you and hope you are finding your way to healing.

I don't want to scare monger but it's always a good idea to get checked out regularly. Your health, happiness and well being are paramount.

The STDs I got were passed skin to skin... but after we'd both been to the clinic, got the all clear from anything else (well, at least I did), I trusted him and we didn't use condoms. Never, ever again for me not until I really am very sure.

Also with these two STDs, about 80% of the population have the viruses apparently, but only 30% show the symptoms. Sometimes these symptoms don't show for years after. Also the symptoms can be mild, especially on men and not showing when they do have them or passed on through shedding.

I guess I was 'lucky' they came up pretty quick so as not to pass them on.

Good luck and take care

Hugs

Even though it's common to be hsv1 or hpv carrier at our age and generation, I want to thank you for this post because it make me re-think my one night stand possibility. Liberating yes, risky yes, too risky I think. type 2 herpes or hiv are not curable and affect your immune system and well being, it's just not worth it. I will buy a " friend" ... I keep saying that but never do, I think I'm shy and embarrassed to do it lol. anyway thanks for ur post. My gut is telling me you will be ok. You caught it early, did what u had to do, got treatment and are working on ur immunity. be strong!