I live on a sort of trendy area. It's 1 am and here I sit outside in the plaza courtyard. I found a small tarp tent to pirtch under. The upscale restaurant is just across the lane and because it the upscale bar. Life is all around me but I'm not in it anymore. Just me and my thoughts... As I sit here wondering why me and telling myself to stop crying why me. Guess what's playing at the bar.... Somebody that I used to know.. Wow it sounds great loud. I want to disappear in it somehow. How could he have done all this to me.... It's not a question, I know the answer yet... I keep asking it over and over and over and over. Why me and how could he do this to me. Sometimes I even answer myself with shut up already and get over it, and then I ask the same question again. It's the shock factor of what I went through. Why me? Why us, why anyone. I wish this forum members were here with me at 1 am on this patio courtyard, I wouldn't feel so alone and isolated in this journey.The world is going round and I'm sitting still. Saddest part is that I have no desire to be a part of it.