owenjohnston's story - part 3

Part 3: Prolonging the Inevitable

The abuse started to get worse.

Every time we went out of the house together he would see attractive guys and say "Mine", he kept telling me about disgusting things he had done before me, like meeting guys for sex in the woods and having sex in public toilets and in his mum's car. He told me of how he had 4 girlfriends at school and cheated on them with each other, and they were a group of friends and ended up hating each other. But now I don't even know if these were lies or just something to get a reaction from me.

He went out with a guy once who had the exact same full name as him, just because of that. He also slept with a guy because they went to school together he he "wanted to fuck someone from the same school". It didn't make sense. It was like a list he had.

On top of that, I discovered 3 months after the cheating that he still spoke to the guy and that they were "friends". I found texts to a guy from England, with the N saying that he would give him kissing lessons and fucking lessons and that he would "swim across the sea if it meant meeting him". (This was to be the person he would eventually leave me for and fuck on what would have been our 2 year anniversary and then post about it on Facebook!)

When we went to the zoo one day and had a good day he told me that it wasn't good because I was there, that it would have been as good with his friends. Any time we had sex, he just forced himself inside me, which hurt A LOT and every time I told him to go gently, he would say "I'm sorry" but do it again next time.

If we were watching a movie and a guy had a really nice car or lots of money he would say "Ooohh mine!" and I'd say "Him?! He's old and fat" and the N would say "Yeah, but he's rich!". I used to come home and find him looking at yachts online and being sad because he couldn't afford one

He would never take me out for dinner, and the worse he treated me, the more money I spent on him.

When we went to the annual gay pride parade, the first guy he cheated on me with was there as a steward and came over they started talking and laughing and hugging right in front of me! and then when the whore left, my N said to me "Awk you're annoyed now".

He was like a total robot towards my feelings. He was never passionate about anything, whereas before I met him I was someone who wore my heart on my sleeve. If I saw an old lady struggling with something I would help her and feel good about it, whereas he would just stand and watch. He told me that I "have an opinion on everything" because I could relate to people in conversation. I used to produce music before I met him and had my own music label, had world famous DJs playing music I made and one time during a film when there was house music in the film he said "That's like that shit you used to make", just out of nowhere.

When I confronted 2 of the people he cheated on me with on Facebook, he got SO angry with me, but in a silent treatment way. Because I told them what he was like and they said that he had "painted a much different picture of the relationship" than I had. He hated me because they stopped speaking to him and told me that they realised he had "played them for fools".

Its funny how insane you think you are until you read up on Narcs and everything clicks into place...