ok today was an alright day I felt like im in a sober living house, cause staying NC is like detox, but at this time I welcome it, the only contact I wish to have with my N is telling her how I feel, im very angry I just feel robbed because I gave of myself and that is the biggest gift you can give anyone plus being completely free with someone mentally, emotionally,sexually for them to take yo places you never been, share feelings you thought you never had, and to find out later it was a complete joke. so yea I was pretty upset and not to mention knowing they can just move on with out a single thought blows me,........ ok but back to my day I was working and the obsessive thought started to come so I tried to think more positive thinking about my goals and living a better a better life and it help for awhile but the thoughts just ssem to grow even more, then I started to have that feeling I needed to talk to a physic I do that when I start to wonder about her, I have an addiction to physics because I couldnt understand what was going on with this person, I just needed some clarity cause I was seeming like I was losing it, they didnt help much cause it just added to my paranoid state, but the good thing is I didnt give in and call. so im going to continue to stay NC its been about a good week.