OK, you were all right the sadness hit me and I have been processing a lot this week. Although, I am NC and it feels good. Well I did slip up tonight because he texted me to talk to D and I texted back and said she wasnt here (she is sleeping over her cousins) and he called me. I did not answer, he tried 3 times and I pressed the ignore button. then he started to text me about how he wanted to say goodbye and would I tell him what he did, etc. I didnt buy into it because to me , it was clearly him wanting N. Supply from me, as he felt he was no longer able to get it from me. So we did exchange a few texts and he said "I wish I never broke up with J, I gave up the best relationship I ever had to work on things with you. J stood by me like no one else ever has". FURIOUS!!!!, so this got me really upset. (he was just telling me how he didnt love her and complaining about the relationship-last week-wtf). To me it seems this woman has no self esteem to want to stay with him after he had a menage with 2 women while on a work trip!!! He is mistaking lack of self esteem for her standing by him.
I see the above as a tactic for him to get NS from me and nothing more. It did bug me a little though hearing how wonderful gf was in his eyes. I will roll on the floor laughing if they get back together, but I will feel sorry for her.
I need to tighten up NC a bit but I am happy I am at least getting the concept and willing to do it now.