Do victims have a choice?

Do victims have a choice?
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A couple of my colleagues were talking about a woman who is engaged to an abusive man. It sounded like the textbook abuse of narcissism.  When one person stated, "she is only emotionally abused, not physically" I had to hide my anger for her naïveté. I interjected, "Is someone going to rescue her?" This same person replied, "It is her choice to stay". I replied, "Unfortunately not everyone has a choice" (knowing that victims are brainwashed and often made dependent on their N's). My colleague returned, "EVERYONE HAS A CHOICE". I disagreed.

In order to maintain professionalism I walked away. Yes, most people have choices in most situations. But many victims of narcissists are unaware that they are even being abused because they are brainwashed and often need help or to be rescued. And sometimes, victims don't know any better because all they are familiar with is abuse.

This conversation took place among doctors, professionals who screen for domestic violence, and even they don't "get it".  Victims are supposed to be able to confide in their doctors and trust they will help, yet even with their education (which requires a quick course in domestic violence) doctors don't even comprehend the all too common reality of the narcissist's abuse!

NarcSurvivor3's picture

Maybe because doctors can't

Maybe because doctors can't see it because they ARE it. You know, the whole God-complex thing - not all of them, but a lot . . .

Emmy's picture

No - no choice

I NEVER saw it for what it was. He was gaslighting us, which by definition is HIDDEN.

Stupid people. We NEED to educate society. I can't stand it and I think I woulda lost it on those people! lol.

((hugs)) - Emmy

Emmy's picture

Oh - AND

ONLY emotionally abused??? GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR