mustlovedogs1960's story

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#1 May 9 - 3PM
mustlovedogs1960
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mustlovedogs1960's story

Kathy's Story - 5 Months with Mac

I've been divorced for 10 years and started on-line dating. I contacted a fellow whom I thought seemed like a good guy. He was a high school teacher and answered many questions with great detail. After on and off emails we decided to meet. January 6, 2012 my first promising date! He was not much to look at but had a such an alluring charm and intelligence that caught me off guard. He leaned in for a kiss and POW that was it for me. He contacted me regularly at first and we met for beers and talked. Our lovemaking was well matched and I felt touched and alive. I was bouncing off the walls at work and everyone knew I was in love. I never told Mac how I felt but it was clear I was smitten! He planned a superbowl weekend away for us. Our weekend turned into an over night in Reno. I met his best friend who was a professional gambler, what kind of profession is that to be proud of??. I was not so impressed with Mac's cheapness and scatter brained attitude. Apparently he was high on pot and that threw me completely off. So the red flags started to appear. At first I'd text to my friend that I was happy then later I would text maybe not so happy. I returned from that overnighter feeling odd about him. The next week was Valentine's day and even though we never made plans, in fact Mac never made plans and just would contact spur of the moment to go out...he called me the Sunday before Valentine's and told me that his old girlfriend contacted him and wanted to try and get back together so they had plans for Valentine's dinner. Ouch! Oh he assured me that his gambling friend bets that I would be the girlfriend but Mac had to take the long shot. Crushed I should have never spoken to him again. He asked to meet me for a beer the Monday before Valentine's day and so I agreed. I told him our intimate time was done because I did not want to share his bed with another woman. I was angry and hurt and asked him what his advice was for me. He told me to keep looking for fellows on OK Cupid. Well if this was true that he had a date on Valentine's day then why was he on OKC at 9:30 pm? Was he just trying to be cruel or see how far I would go?

I was feeling really badly. He texted a few days later and asked to see me on our typical Tuesday. He brought me home to sing and play the piano and I got caught up in his charm all over again. He called the next day to ask me out for Friday. Wow I felt great about that until the date turned into several mutual acquaintances getting together. Mac was higher than a kite and totally drunk. I do not believe I had ever seen him in this state of being out of control and sort of morose. Turned out he asked me to drive him to the airport the next morning for his friend's memorial in LA and his long lost girlfriend (the Valentine's date) will be driving him back to town. WTF is wrong with me?

So he comes back and we meet up a couple of more times and he cooks me dinner and sings love songs. I'm sort of bored but still have feelings for him. On 3/13/12 he takes me out and tells me he loves me! OK I am not dropping the "L" bomb nor did I ask for it. He takes me home and cooks dinner but no lovemaking. I go home and we continue to text. He asks me to go on a drive with him one Sunday. His idea and his plans that I arrive at 12:30. It was just before his birthday so I brought over a card, champagne, balloon. It took him a while to answer the door but he is in his robe and I asked are you ill? He stammers and whinces and says well not exactly. He asks me to meet him at the nearby coffee shop. Light bulb !!! he has another woman there! I said hell no. Walked away. That should have been the end of it but no I was in a rage of pain. The dude got busted but he really never sincerely apologized. He wanted me to feel that pain! It really hurt yet I still communicated with him. My sisters did not want to ever meet him and my bff wanted to call him a liar because he told her when he first met her he would never hurt me.

April came and he gave me the ST. Why I could not stop texting or trying to communicate is my illness and compulsive behavior. I was out of town for work and I decided to call him and tell him I was doing great. So we agreed to meet up on May 1. In the meantime I found this beautiful support group here that has given me much strength. Well during our last meeting on May 1, I looked great and I went into our meet up feeling that it would be the last time. I tried to give him another chance but when I reached out to caress his face he said he could not allow me to do so. I knew he had another victim but he kept telling me he loves me. Totally jacked up. I said I cannot not do this anymore I'm going now. He teared up and was so dam pathetic looking. He walked me to my car and I drove away. I felt free. Still pissed off that I had to endure this pain but free.

He texted me an odd message on my birthday Monday but I have not responded. I last emailed him on Friday May 4 and I pray daily that I do not contact him again.

His actions were hurtful and cruel and his words were cutting at times. When I found out about the OW he showed no remorse just that he got "busted"! Never again will I fall prey - I hope I never fall prey.

Be strong out there and don't let Narcs get to us.

Thank you for reading my story.

May 9 - 4PM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Welcome to Narcville.. I'm

May 9 - 9PM (Reply to #2)
mustlovedogs1960
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added thoughts

May 10 - 12AM (Reply to #3)
mustlovedogs1960
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update

May 10 - 11AM (Reply to #4)
Canada
Canada's picture

Hi! Absolutely, NC is the

May 10 - 1PM (Reply to #5)
mustlovedogs1960
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NC - Yes

May 10 - 4PM (Reply to #6)
Cozy
Cozy's picture

Hi There, OMG I have been

May 10 - 4PM (Reply to #7)
mustlovedogs1960
mustlovedogs1960's picture

Yes it's hard

May 11 - 1AM (Reply to #8)
mustlovedogs1960
mustlovedogs1960's picture

NC today