Here's what I got from my ex narc for Valentines Day this year:

One text message that simply said "I know you don't think I love you because I don't show it very much but I do. Smile it's Valentines Day!"

Followed by nothing else for the rest of the day. No replies to my texts, no visit from him, no phone call.

Mine loves to throw a curveball onto an otherwise potentially sweet thing to say. Some examples:

"If you're wondering whether I miss you, of course I do. But it isn't very sharp because we talk a lot."

"I don't want your nice words and affections because when they stop it will be unbearable."

"You have the kind of beauty that when someone looks at you at first they don't notice anything special, but as they continue to look, they see you're actually beautiful."

"Why can't I feel strong for you? You're so passionate and amazing and you're here with me. I should feel strong for you but I can't. I'm probably burned by that previous situation."

"You're so sweet and good and say such nice things to me and I know you want to hear tender words. But I just can't. I don't feel a desire to say them."

"My 5 year old son said that he loves you. I know it's not the adult kind of love that you're wanting, but anyway..."

"I don't care about other women because I have you. They're just decorations."

And then there's the straight-forward cruel or table-turning psychobabble:

"I have someone and she cares for me. It doesn't matter that she's a hundred and one, it's ok for me." (note: I was 37 and he was 35 when he said this. WTF? He also used to tell me I "look so young" when I'm having sex - as though this should be a great compliment to me. I still don't get this - I don't look old, I get carded for alcohol still at 40, I'm also fit and pretty attractive, and I've never had an age issue so not sure why he thinks this is important to me)

"Having you is enough for me. I'm too lazy to try to find something better."

"I can't be supportive/affectionate on command."

"You're selfish because you want me to drop everything just because you have some time, and it doesn't matter how I might feel or if I have things to do. You only know how you feel and what you want and if I don't respond you get upset. You don't care what might be going on with me." This was when I had taken a day off work to rearrange time to spend with him at his request and then he "forgot" about the arrangement and made other plans.

"I'm sorry that you overreacted." Oh...I LOVE this one :).

"I don't know how to behave with you. I'm constantly afraid you're going to choose to be offended by some small unimportant thing and am always wondering what will be the next scandal you make." (note: I don't make "scandals". I discuss things very logically and calmly, so also have no idea where this comes from)

"Instead of being determined to offend yourself with something I did or said, you should say to yourself - "I know he wouldn't do something to hurt me, so he must have had his reasons."

And my two favorites:

"I like you."

"You don't trust me. You are always expecting something bad from me." (well....duh!)

Definition:

"It has long been a widespread belief that weasels suck the yolks from bird's eggs, leaving only the empty shell. This belief is the basis of the term 'weasel words', used to describe statements that have had the life sucked out of them. The expression refers to words that are added to make a statement sound more legitimate and impressive but which are in fact unsubstantiated and meaningless."
http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/weasel-words.html

THEY ARE WEASELS and their words are shallow and meaningless.

My head is still in bumblef##k land and maybe am choosing not to recall many of his crazy statements. One thing for sure, what he said was straight forward and not double talk. Just plain old f'n crazy.

From now on, if my brow wrinkles or if I even remotely have a WTF feeling from something anyone says- I'm heading in the other direction-no questions asked.

I regret now that I wasn't strong enough to just say "WTF are you talking about??" Of course, I did this at the end...and then, it was the end! Fat, bloated tick-EWWWWW

Reason

"I really respect you. Before you, I thought women were just there to have sex with. I never thought I could have a friendship with a girl"

Oh gee, how flattered am I. Blatant admission...should have ran the other way.

In a text: "You're an amazing person, and so am I" (After I dumped his ass). Lol!

Oh, I have another one. Actually, probably like everyone on here, I could go on for days ;)

When the D&D was happening...

When he ended things I asked why he said he was obsessed with me and so in love with me and he missed me (the day he did that)... His reply, "that must be confusing for you. I guess I was confused about my feelings for you." Then he goes and tells me that love is not the issue at all and I am wonderful.

I asked why he proposed... His reply, "That must be confusing as well. I never felt great about the engagement." I told him then the engagement was a lie... His reply, "No, it wasn't a lie. I really wanted to marry you and be with you forever."

Oh, yea... He also said (after being together FIVE years and just proposing to me three and a half months before) you aren't longterm so I wasn't doing us any favors by sticking around anymore.

WTF!?

we were together at least 7 or 8 years when he tells me he never loved me he just wanted us to get a house together and drive me off the cliff and get the house. I still to this day many years later, wish to HELL I had left him for good! then and there...................

After I emailed him to apologize for our argument and ask him why he blocked me on gchat (this was before I knew about narcs, let alone NC).

'Indeed, this is about trust, milady. You really hurt my feelings by calling me selfish and whatnot. But I'll give you another chance because I know you're a little unstable and it's not really your fault. Anyway, I never 'blocked' you, so feel free to text if you want to talk. I don't hate you. :p "