I just feel stuck!

I just feel stuck!
Posted April 24, 2012 - 4:45pm
1

It has been almost 4 months NC and dont why but i checked his facebook - which in the 7 yrs together he very rarely used. In the last week he has never been off it. I am not his friend on facebook but his profile is open, although his photos have recently been put private. There he is living the high life after recently becoming a millionaire and has his profile picture of him and OW whom he was seeing before we spilt.

He is desperate to get married and have kids and will soon be engaged to her. They are moving into their first house together on Friday ( on his fb)!!

I dont even know what i am asking, just needed to get the feeling on envy I have towards him moving onwards and upwards and here I am feeling static!

He hoovered 2 weeks ago telling me he was drowning with no communication from me and how he was really missing me and then an hoover through a friend on Thursday telling her he wanted to speak to me to make sure i was ok, that we had spent 7 yrs together and that he really cared for me - I know this is all bullshit and am in CD at the moment.

I know the mask will stay on until they are married or she is preganant. Just so pissed off tonight and know I have done this to myself but looking!!!

‹ Backwards and obsessional Thank u...you know who u are. ›
Deidre99's picture

Two weeks ago, he reached out

April 25, 2012 - 1:03pm — Deidre99

Two weeks ago, he reached out to you, saying he's drowning with no communication from you.

Last week, he reached out to a friend about you.

He's touting on facebook that he's happy and getting engaged.

If anyone for a minute ever wonders if what these jackasses post on facebook is real...COME TO THIS THREAD AND READ...AND REREAD.

FB is one big lie...a narc's dream.

Behind the scenes, is reality.

I feel sorry for the new girl, that's for sure. In for a world of pain.

Stay NC, and you are doing great at 4 months NC! Seriously, be proud of how far you have come.

shazza060969's picture

thankyou x

April 25, 2012 - 1:45pm — shazza060969

Reminded myself today to be proud of my achievements thus far, buying going out shopping and buying 4 new beautiful dresses in a UK size 8 (US size 4), after losing 6 dress sizes in those 4 months (28lbs)

I took up running for the first time at 42 as I have so much energy now that is not being wasted on his chaos and bs!!

People are seeing me and telling me how wonderful I look and others have been facebooking me to say they have seen me out running and what great shape I am in!!

These are nice reminders what his D&D did to me in the end - and its all positive- he has given me my body as well as returning my mind to a state of peace and tranquillity with the occassionally CD nipping in every now and then when he hoovers

Thanks again xx onwards and upwards to nc forever!!

Sparrow's picture

Any contact equals pain.

April 24, 2012 - 9:30pm — Sparrow

Any contact equals pain. Including Facebook. Tomorrow is a new day. Hang tight, you will get there.

Know that you will make mistakes along the way. This is hard, and you wont always feel stuck, but if you continue to "peek" you will.

Good luck and say strong!

Janie53's picture

You have been doing so well.

April 24, 2012 - 5:16pm — Janie53

You have been doing so well. Keep moving forward and no looking back!
Stay true!

xxxooo
Janie

shazza060969's picture

i know ....

April 24, 2012 - 5:20pm — shazza060969

i wont ever answer his texts not ever, he has tried everything to get me to anger, pity, one liners and reverse psychology bs bs bs....

annoyed that i feel envy but going to stay away form his fb as it has caused me to be pissed off...

Thanks Janie xxx hugs xx

Janie53's picture

Shazza

April 24, 2012 - 8:26pm — Janie53

Good job; believe me starting over from scratch is awful. It just gets worse every time, regardless of how much you have learned about the disorder.

Keep going!
Stay true!

xoxoxo

Trainwreck56's picture

Be Pissed, but I were you

April 24, 2012 - 5:04pm — Trainwreck56

stay off of FACE BOOK!

NC is the only answer! The OW will not fare any better!

I've bee NC a few day less than 90 days! She
will be in hell sooner that she knows!

Remove your interest in what he is up to, NO FRIKIN GOOD
I'M SURE!

NCNCNC and move forward, WHY TORTURE YOURSELF?

TW

nc

Tar Heel Blue's picture

TW will remind us

April 25, 2012 - 10:57am — Tar Heel Blue

that CONTACT = PAIN.

That has proven itself to be true in EVERY case I have seen on this forum. And it sure as hell doesn't hurt THEM.

Even a peek at him on Facebook brings it all flooding back, and you don't need to be reminded of that, especially by your own doing. It is SO tempting, I know. But it's contact and guess what, it ALWAYS results in your pain.

NC NC NC! 27 days and getting better with each one! Before we know it we'll be at nearly 90 days like TW! (And CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU, TW, YOU ROCK!!)

Trainwreck56's picture

YOU BET YOUR ASS, I WILL REMIND YOU ALL!

April 25, 2012 - 3:58pm — Trainwreck56

CONTACT=HORRIBLE PAIN, AND EACH TIME YOU CHOOSE TO GO BACK TO THE SOURCE OF YOUR PAIN, THEY KICK THE D&D INTO OVER DRIVE!

THIS TIME FOR ME, I'M DONE!!!

The HELL I went though with him when I went back after 62 days NC WAS HORRENDOUS!

HE WOULD D & D ME, WEAR ME OUT, AND IT NEVER GOT BETTER, ALL HE WANTED TO DO WAS FIGHT!

HE CAN GO BACK TO HELL WHERE HE CAME FROM, DON'T MISS THAT
LUNATIC, DON'T LOVE HIM-HE DESTROYED ALL OF THAT!

NCNCNCNCNCNC............

YOU WILL FEEL STRONGER AND BETTER SOON, YOU OWE HIM NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HUGS

TW

shazza060969's picture

trying....

April 24, 2012 - 5:10pm — shazza060969

Really trying. Curosity got the better of me and you know what that does and it did!!!

Thanks TW x