futility of Revenge

futility of Revenge
Posted April 17, 2012 - 9:47pm
1

Dear Friends,

I see from many postings that several of you are planning/plotting revenge on the respective men/women who perpetrated Crime on us.

My PLEA to all of you is...forget it. REVENGE is useless on a Narc/Psychopath. As Sparrow, Goldie, Lisa, Hunter and others mods have observed... these N/P's are immune to any feelings. Till life exists inside their shell, they will harass innocent folk like us.

whoever has the chance to run away from the binding, please do so without wasting further time. and do not look back.

we can regain our life no matter what our age is.

i am 50+, and I await my release from this dungeon.

I am making this post in deep earnest and seriousness. Please know that i have experienced HELL in this marriage. YET, I choose to GET OUT as soon as practically possible...and runnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn far away.

never looking back.

i will write off these wasted 20+ yrs of my life as Bad Karma.

Please pray that i am released from this marriage trap at the Earliest.

Blessings, love, light, and God Speed

‹ wishing the void that i feel would go away day 2 of NC ›
Allie's picture

I will never actually seek out revenge

April 18, 2012 - 11:13am — Allie

on my N/Psychopath, though I surprised myself with my vengeful thoughts yesterday. In the end it would only hurt me. He would know how much I hate him, and that would give him more supply. No, for the first time since I was 15 I have no illusions about the man. He repulses me in everyway.

freaked's picture

Congrats Allie

April 18, 2012 - 12:04pm — freaked

You escaped the Matrix. CHEERS.

No Contact includes No Revenge. stop.

Here we are, getting liberated mentally.
Now to LIBERATE ourself PHYSICALLY , i.e., GET OUT OF THE DEATH GRIP OF THE N/P.

VIVA LA VIDA!!!
(coldplay)

Allie's picture

Thanks :)

April 18, 2012 - 3:05pm — Allie

and I love that song! :))

tootsgee's picture

when it came to thoughts of

April 18, 2012 - 5:51am — tootsgee

when it came to thoughts of revenge - I have always thought it was pointless as he has no soul and a rage I could never match.

i think he would always win no matter what so better not to engage or even get involved with revenge.

freaked's picture

EX-ACT-LY. Tracey, you

April 18, 2012 - 5:59am — freaked

EX-ACT-LY. Tracey, you deciphered the situation perfectly.
Satying anything at all, doing anything at all by way of recrimination is like pouring water on a duck's back...oh it just rolls off.

Waste of water, duck remains unperturbed.

Unfortunately, I have wasted 23 YEARS trying to fight for justice and fairplay in my marriage .. such a useless exercise ..

ONLY now, realisation dawned.

and I am frantically sharing with all at the forum.

oh just LEAVE the n/p to their devices...and move on. I assure you looking back is detrimental only to us...no effect on them.

(deviating a bit to remember Us and Them by Pink Floyd)..

as I said earlier, I HAVE MOVED ON ...now awaiting release from prison (marriage) term.

Sparrow's picture

I couldn't have said it

April 17, 2012 - 10:06pm — Sparrow

I couldn't have said it better myself. Seeking revenge is a ridiculous notion and gets in the way of your healing. One minute spent on even the thought of seeking revenge, is a minute wasted on your recovery.

Heed the words that Freaked has written, for they are true.

I will pray for your early release, as I am sure you and your child will as well. No one deserves to live the hell that you have to live. No one.

Remain strong and remain committed to your efforts. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.

freaked's picture

gratitudes to you dear

April 17, 2012 - 10:18pm — freaked

gratitudes to you dear Sparrow.
Now, I am praying to God in all sincerity possible to please give me a RELEASE from the death vice grip of n/p h

i will take my child with me, i know i can survive well once i receive my release from here.

Sincere Gratitudes for your Prayer for me. I feel so deeply touched.

bluestmarble's picture

Revenge? Well, it all depends...

April 17, 2012 - 10:02pm — bluestmarble

I posted a few weeks back that I did, in fact, get "revenge."

I had found out that the narcissist in my life was a convicted felon, and a registered sex offender convicted of molesting a young girl.

My "revenge"? The state site is not crawled/indexed by search engines... so unless a woman actually went there LOOKING for Narc as a sex offender, she wouldn't know. And how many women would do that?

So yep - I got my revenge by duplicating the information on several sites which ARE crawled by the search engines, so that in the future, any woman who looks up the Narc's name will see that he is a registered sex offender.

Is this revenge? Possibly. Am I thrilled that it makes it harder for him to victimize other women, other GIRLS? DEFINITELY.

So, whatever works, ladies!

Cheers to all of our futures - which will be bright!

wsh's picture

Revenge?

April 18, 2012 - 6:57am — wsh

Maybe. Personally, I think what you did is called a PUBLIC SERVICE! Will never know how many girls/women you saved from him.

God bless you.

julesuk's picture

bluestmarble

April 18, 2012 - 5:43am — julesuk

I take my hat off to you for this you cannot sweep stuff like this under the carpet. My psycho/N is also a registered sex offender (had seven counts consensual sex with son's fifteen year old girlfriend). In the UK this would be really hard to do as we have data protection act, Human Rights Act and all that bollocks. Therefore he is being allowed to ply his trade with no fear of repercussions. I have heard that he is on top level supervision with probation as he has shown no remorse and wouldn't attend rehab programmes while inside.

His probation runs out in July so he will have even more freedom including being able to contact me again. These scumbags need naming and shaming so no other innocent victims are hurt again.

GOOD FOR YOU GIRL YOU ROCK just wish I could do the same to him.

Yes our futures will all be bright again some day
xx

no more an echo's picture

justice

April 17, 2012 - 11:47pm — no more an echo

That wasn't revenge- it was JUSTICE! Also, you've made the world a safer place. Thanks, bluestmarble!

freaked's picture

Dear, let us stop using the

April 17, 2012 - 10:34pm — freaked

Dear, let us stop using the word 'revenge'.
it cheapens us and harms us indescribably.

let's say you did a Good Samaritan job in posting ALERTS on all those websites.

IMPORTANT to throw that word REVENGE out of our dictionary, window, door, life.

it is a thought that will HARM US EVEN MORE THAN THE DAMAGE ALREADY INFLICTED ON US

Hope all on this forum understand my PLEA.

I want all of us to have a safe passage out of the HELL we got thrown into.

and remember...THERE SHOULD BE NO LOOKING BACK.

REVENGE = LOOKING BACK

BANISH ALL THOUGHT OF REVENGE. JUST MOVE ON ON ON

kimberly4398's picture

Destructive revenge for me.no

April 17, 2012 - 9:56pm — kimberly4398

Destructive revenge for me.no way. Not worth giving him the pleasure that I care that much or the jail time. My sweet revenge will be my happiness when I process all the damage and I.hope I see that rat bastard out after that and my reconstruction surgery on my boobs is.done. imma look right thru him and show him I.am totally aware of my sexy little self

kimberly4398's picture

Don't get me wrong I have

April 17, 2012 - 10:01pm — kimberly4398

Don't get me wrong I have killed him a million times in my head in a million different ways. The wood chipper was my favorite. But I would never act on those thoughts.

freaked's picture

Kimberly, have you been

April 17, 2012 - 10:04pm — freaked

Kimberly, have you been released from your n/p ?

if yes, then please forget about that nazi. it will do us no good to have any further negative thoughts. it would be like trying to take revenge on the Death Row Electric Chair.

kimberly4398's picture

I forget him a little more

April 17, 2012 - 10:07pm — kimberly4398

I forget him a little more everyday. But I am still adjusting. Just 3 weeks in

Run4it's picture

Dear Freaked,

April 17, 2012 - 9:55pm — Run4it

I am asking God to clear your path to freedom and healing and to give you the wisdom and power of discernment to draw healthy, loving friends and support close.

"For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them." Matt 18:20

Run4it

Armed's picture

In agreement....Amen.

April 17, 2012 - 11:36pm — Armed

In agreement....Amen.

freaked's picture

Dear Run4it, deepest

April 17, 2012 - 10:02pm — freaked

Dear Run4it, deepest gratitudes for your Prayer for me. I am getting goosepimples now as I read this in your post: "For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them." Matt 18:20

I PRAY FOR RELEASE FROM THIS HELL MARRIAGE

Pray for you and for every member here at the Forum and others who have not yet found this forum...MAY GOD GRANT RELEASE FOR US FROM THE DEATH GRIP OF THE NPD/PSYCOPATH.

Dear God...... Please Help Us.

Tar Heel Blue's picture

Dear Run4it and freaked,

April 17, 2012 - 10:25pm — Tar Heel Blue

I can't tell you how much your posts have touched my heart.

May God bless you and keep you all safe in the palm of His hand, until we are all delivered from the particular Hell we live in.

You have my most sincere prayers. Please God hear us, give us all strength and courage, and protect us from evil.

freaked's picture

THANK YOU DEAR TAR HEEL

April 17, 2012 - 10:35pm — freaked

THANK YOU DEAR TAR HEEL BLUE.
Value your prayer very deeply.
reciprocate the good wish to yu too