Stillstanding181's Story

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#1 Apr 14 - 5PM
Stillstanding181
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Stillstanding181's Story

2 Years Later After Leaving My Ex N

I was with my N for 7 years and I left him 3 times. The final split was 2 years ago and still I can remember things that he said and did to hurt me throughout the "fake" relationship. We have mutual friends so I run into him every week...now with the new victim. It has not been easy watching the show but I have managed to ignore them. I did try unsuccessfully to be civil to him over the past few years sporadically but whenever I thought we just might be able to be civil ... he would drop the cruel bomb just for kicks. He tried over the past few years to weasel his way back in but I did not fall for it which resulted in more cruel accusations from him. He actually accused me of manupulating him for 7 years which is just plain sad. It is true that you can never really be civil much less friendly with a N because they do not take it for what your intentions are ... to just be civil. No they will see this as a sign of weakness and it will give them a sick satisfaction and the games will begin again. Once I realized two years ago that nothing would ever change or make him be the man that I had fallen in love with in the beginning I knew I had no choice but to end things. It was the only decision to make and eventhough I was and am still in love with him ... I know now it is the illusion of who he portrayed himself to be that I love and not the real person that he is. His newest supply is in awe of him and I watch this woman and see myself years ago. I know what she will endure down the road for it is only a matter of time. I can not warn her because she would never believe me so I can do nothing but ignore them both. She tries to be friendly to me why I do not know. I purchased the Path Forward and reading it made me cry at times because I identify with so much of it. He still watches me when I see him to see if he can get a reaction from me of any sort and he gets nothing...something that N's can not handle. Time does heal but it is a long road and in the end I will be the one still standing. I want to say to all women who have had or are going through a "fake" relationship with an N please remember that they are the ones who are seriously flawed...they are the ones who will never be able to be normal and they will take everything from you unless you stand up and remember that you are in control of what you will and will not tolerate...you are in control of what you will allow the N to do to you. You can make the decision to end it and you will survive it. It will not be easy but it will be freedom in every sense of the word. You can do it and be strong. Noone has the right to hurt you, disrespect you, be cruel to you, humiliate you or abuse you unless you allow it. Narcissist men are like 6 year old children who will never evolve. Love yourself first and leave... Be Strong.

Apr 14 - 5PM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Welcome to Narcville

Apr 14 - 5PM (Reply to #2)
florence (not verified)
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Nuff said

Apr 14 - 11PM (Reply to #3)
Stillstanding181
Stillstanding181's picture

Thanks