I have read often on this forum that some would liike to be hoovered- that hoovering means their narcs really care and miss them. I whole heartedly disagree. This is my perspective-
Hoovering is yet another tool used by the narcissist to achieve supply. Perhaps, he is angry we ended the relationship and he wants the chance to discard us himself or perhaps he can't find supply else where so he'll strike in what he thought was the safe zone. But It is really just a further example of calculated manipulation they use to control our lives. They try to appeal to our sentimentalities and/ or our vulnerabilities . It is more of the same, emotional blackmail that use so they can continue to be the ring leader, but only if we let them.
No Contact sends a very loud and clear message; it shouldn't be difficult to interpret. I am done, go away! Hoovering, to me just reinforces the pathology of these hollow men and demonstrates they cannot, do not and will not respect us or our boundaries. Utter disrspect! Please, don't wish to be hoovered.