I realize that it is the N who usually ends it, in one way or another. In my relationship with exN, hr ultimately did. But during the drawn out devaluation stage, i had angry moments where I would telk him "it's over" (guess Ii still had some fire in me). To this he always responded with "you must have never loved me at all!!" or "i shouldnt have to deal with this". One time he even said "i you say that again, i really will leave you!" . But he never once questioned what HE was doing wrong to make me do this. Sometimes i really think i attempted to end it because my subconscious was trying to save me. Did any of you experience this?