Did you narc seem immature? Mine was horribly immature. I think that's another reason we didn't have many mutual friends. His siblings are also stunted emotionally.
That was one of the reasons I started looking into what was wrong with my exN...childish in so many ways and than saying its everyone else..which is classic..there mental state I think is stuck at a 6yr old in most cases..and there greedy..like a child with toys.
They are as emotionally mature as they were at the point of trauma. Even though they can be mature in all other aspects of their life such as business, education, emotionally they are indeed stunted. Just like alcoholics and drug addicts.
Mine was 54 years old and was a genius, literally.......but acted like a school boy in social environments. In other words, he was an idiot. :)
The exboyfiend Narc was Very immature...I would say he acted like a wanna be 16 year old...His glory days were in High school where he was the football star and voted best looking...the guy is 46 and STILL boasts about these days as if they were yesterday...obviously because those were his peak years...he never made anything of his life...so those were his true glory days....GET OVER IT DUDE!!!!
His son was 16 and he would hang out with him and his friends as if they came over to see HIM...it's kinda sad when you think about it....
The exhusband Narc was the complete opposite though...he acted like a 60 year old when we were in our 20s...
they are just strange creaturs.....
The ironic part is he would always tell me I was immature. My ex N was also an alcoholic (yes I picked a real winner) and I have read that can stunt your maturity too, as in he started drinking heavily as a teenager and his brain didn't develop much past that.
I went through that too. I wanted to talk and problem solve, he sulked, baited me for arguments (which I did not take), spoke to me like I was a child, and would say stuff like, "I know we work at a high school, but that doesn't mean WE have to act like we are in high school too." This coming from the "man" who said just a few sentences earlier, "Yeah, I have a new girlfriend and now I feel comfortable to talk to you." Ummm, just like high school? At the end of that argument, the final one, he walked off after mentioning his late wife and my never understanding and HE started crying. I was appalled, to say the least, and amazed that it went from zero to crazy in about 2 minutes. It was crazy and I've not spoken to him since. He's CRAZY, DRAMA KING. I just remembered that he said he watched tv all week, during thanksgiving break, and it was Jerry Springer. HUGE RED FLAG...I remember saying, "Really??" And I was really surprised. He also enjoyed hanging out with high school basketball players...gross. He acted like he was one of the popular bball boys. I used to think naw, he's a grown man; but he wasn't. He walked and acted just like they did. I was never the type to get into the whole "basketball ambiance" thing and just felt slightly embarrassed that he acted that way.
I think I'm getting to the point I can laugh about his behavior, but I am still cautious just because it reminds me of how I didn't protect myself even with all those clues.
I have named mine "the child" because of how immature he is. He has no impulse control. He throws temper tantrums when he doesn't get his way. He takes no responsibility for anything. Not even his health. He is severely diabetic and has been for 20 years (he's only 45) and he still eats like a kid. Candy, soda, etc. He spends extensive amounts of time playing fantasy games on his computer (like Gothic 3) and keeps his 10 year old son up until midnight sometimes (yes, on school nights) to play with him. I could go on and on...
That was one of the reasons I
They are as emotionally
Sparrow
The exboyfiend Narc was Very
The ironic part is he would
I BABY SAT a 35 Year old
I have named mine "the child"