Je Suis' Story

Good morning, and thank you for being here! I read many posts yesterday, and am amazed to find that so many of us have had similar experiences. It can feel really lonely, because most people would never believe the abuse I've suffered at the hands of this monster. His false public face, is quite convincing.

I call myself Je Suis, because it's French for "I am," and I haven't been myself for four years. I have been slowly diminished by my N, and now that I'm NC for 7 weeks, I see how much I was putting up with.

He D & D'd me, which I'm starting to be really happy about.
I realized what I might be dealing with about a year ago, but just didn't want to believe it. And the times when he was nice to me made me think I was wrong. He had a way, also, of making me feel like there was something crazy about me.

So my life right now has: No more of the put downs, over the top compliments followed by periods of devaluation, crazy driving, broken promises, listening to his whiny sob story for hours on end, or his having to touch every woman in any room we entered. No more of his lies, and half truths. No more hearing about how amazing his female friends are. No more of his criticism, and eye rolling. No more interupting anything I say of importance. No more pointing out that I have something on my face or in my hair, when I don't. No more controlling who I see, what I do, what I order to eat, what I wear. No more controlling of my time by a person who is always late. Always. Oh my! "No more" feels really great to say right now.

No more narcissist.
More and more hope!

Thanks! Je Suis