sunflowergrl70 story

My ex-fiance came into my life slowly. I had known of him for a couple of years through work. He did have a bad reputation and I was aware of some of the stunts he pulled. Heck there were times when he would come into the lounge and talk and I would be "icked out". It was always tuff about his ex-wife or ex-girlfriend and how they were bad or never communicated with him.

When we first got together it was "too good to be true". He would call to talk and would tell me how he was getting back into running because of me (I'm a runner). He wanted to give me a windbreaker because he knew I ran in all kinds of weather and was worried about me getting wet.

He was very affectionate toward me and could never seem to keep his hands off of me. It was great. We had an amazing sex life and seemed to connect.

He got me into (addicted) to skiing and we would go on amazing trips where we would ski 6 hours a day and would be physical twice a day every day. I'm an active person and I LOVED this life. I still miss it.

His "mind games" were what would push me over the edge. He was constantly making little remarks about old girlfriends. When we went on our first ski trip together he told me how he had "taken 10 other people on this trip". His college friend was no better (another narcissist) and loved to tell stories about all the old girlfriends he had brought and how he loved to try to "break them".

We got engaged two years into our relationship. By this time I was still living out of a bag and staying with him when my kids were with their father. The day he gave me the ring he asked me "you aren't going to take my last name are you"? He wanted the engagement to be kept a secret.

I finally got tired of his "committment phobia" and left him. The last straw came when he saw his teenage son with a pack of cigarettes in his pocket. He grabbed the cigarette pack and then threw the kid on the ground! His daughter called him up and bitched him out about it then turned around all "lovey dovey" the next week when she wanted a belly button ring. The kid dynamics were so adolescent!

I finally broke up with him a couple of months ago. He was fine until he found out I was dating again. He harrassed me at home in front of my kids, stalked me at church and wouldn't leave me alone at work. He even threatened the guy I am currently seeing.

It went too far when he was asked to leave church for harrassing me there. He was kicked out of church and he actually got threatening with a DEACON!

I finally had to get a restraining order. The story that finally got me to that point is BIZARRE.

At this point I am still reeling from this. I spent four years with this guy and trying to "change" him. I still worry that I have feelings for him. I am dating, but don't feel anything.

I would love to hear stories from others about the "mind games". I doubt myself at every turn, but I know that he's no good for me.