What a terrible feeling... here you are dealing with reality... poopy diapers and all... and he's off in la la land with his new girlfriend. Ouch.

But what does it tell you that you are barely divorced and the girlfriend already has moved in? This is far from healthy! Even though it's painful, try to find some validation in this all. And feel badly for the new GF... It may be fun & games now, but the truth will come out in the end.

9 years ago, I remember reading how my ex-Psychopath professor had married the curator (she is a decade OLDER than me), she had been a June bride, they had twins.

I felt envious at the time... thinking "is she smarter than me? Is she nicer to him? Why was she able to declare her love to him, and he didn't lecture her in front of everybody to the point of tears? Why was she able to share his bed, and he punished me for having sexual feelings for him?"

I know those feelings. I WAS the one who was envious--single, alone, devastated, jobless--I envied her with the cute little babies, toting the diapers and with the perfect house! She was his wife, the mother of his children... and I had been thrown away like garbage.

I felt the envy... it was natural. Don't beat yourself up for jealousy. You're human. Don't punish yourself for being human (that's what Narcs/Psychs do to us)

One day, those feelings will pass.

To quote French Buddhist philosopher Mathieu Ricard, "Happiness is an inside job." There's the saying that it's not about having what you want, but wanting what you have.

Remember- you are a beautiful, loving, intelligent person! Nobody can take that away from you!

OMG honey catch your breath. I know this is so hard for you right now. You have got to understand and believe that this is a blessing. Her perfect skin, perfect hair, and perfect life is NOT what it appears on the outside. Remember who she is with. Remember the damage he caused to you. This is a cycle. He will do to her what he did to you. Her beautiful life that is so perfect is moving in motion as we speak. Her days will begin to get worse and worse with him. It is inevitable. It happens to everyone that is with a Narc. Regardless of how beautiful you may be or what a rocking personality you may have. They will find a way to despise and loath you in the end because this is what they do best. She will be right where you are before you know it. Hold your head up high. You are the lucky one. You have those beautiful children that love you unconditionally. Make a wonderful dinner, put a movie on, grab up all those kiddies and spend your time with what is most important tonight.

Try to shop elsewhere if possible from here on out.

Thinking of you xoxoxoxoo

only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

Not to wish evil on others, but in a little while with him she will look like shit and be sitting at home while he is out screwing someone else. Meanwhile, you will have regained your beauty, poise and health--and you'll have your awesome children.

In ten years she'll be you looking at her. Seek solace in that!