Making Sense of the Insanity
-Kaleah LaRoche

I have been studying and working with narcissism for many years and have devoted a portion of my life to helping others who have suffered the cruel, heartless, devaluation of a narcissistic personality.

Although it is difficult to make sense of insanity, I attempt to at least help those who have been victimized by narcissistic personality disorder, to find some sense and peace in their lives.

Finding closure is near impossible with a narcissistic personality, however finding closure within yourself is the key to overcoming and moving on with your life.

I came to understand narcissistic personality disorder after my own personal experiences that left me in a psychologists office truly believing their was something terribly wrong with ME! Yes, like most, I believed that I was the problem. After all the man in my life at the time was very convincing.

My therapist did a complete assessment on me and her conclusion was that I had been involved with someone who had narcissistic personality disorder. This is what began my study.

Although I don't believe it serves any of us to call ourselves victims, we are often victimized without our knowledge or awareness. When we become aware of what is happening we can take control of our lives once again and become empowered.

The important thing to know is that there is life after narcissistic abuse! I have lived it and I have not only survived but I thrived. I used this experience to embrace a strengh within myself I didn't know was there. Now I live from this strength and I love from it as well.

I find one of the great secrets to a successful recovery is to stop focusing on what he or she took from you and instead focus on what you have gained. Karmic law ensures that the scales are balanced and although it may feel that the narcissist got off easy and you are the one left dealing with the emotional wreckage, there is restitution. Universal law requires it.

Part of the restitution is that you have an opportunity here to search your soul in a way you never have. You have an opportunity to tap into a love for yourself and others that you previously didn't know was there.

Through the dark night of the soul, a new life is born. So although it may feel that you are walking in complete darkness in the aftermath of the narcissistic devaluation, you are only walking through a storm, and the sun will shine on your life again. You must believe in this.

Use this time to go deeper into your own being and look for what is truly valuable there. You have likely been devalued for a long time and struggling with feelings of worthlessness. To get beyond these feelings you must focus, not on the worthlessness, but on the value, the worth. Find what is good about you. Find what is loveable. Talk to friends who care about you and get their positive input. Eventually you will come to find that the devaluation you suffered through was merely the projection of the narcissist. From his own deep sense of worthlessness he had to invest an incredible amount of energy to keep you down, in order that he feel superior.

You don't have to appease the narcissist anymore. The game is over. It is now time to take care of yourself and get your soul back. He will go on being who he has always been. You on the other hand, will become greater for having survived such a horrible injustice.

I have quite a bit of information that should be helpful for you on your road to recovery. Take the time to read, study and become knowledgable. This is your best path of healing.