My N is a lesbian... has deep issues with mommy.

The main source of supply- girlfriend: must be 3-5 years younger than her (easier to manipulate/control), slim build, attractive, dark hair/dark eyes, preferably latina. Must put up with all the cheating, emotional and otherwise. Also, must accept that their needs, families, everything about them comes second to the N.

The secondary source of supply- me and the other girls on the side: slightly overweight (must think that equals low self esteem), older, smart, very maternal and loving (hello mommy issues!), attractive, family oriented, no children, preferably straight or appears to be! Must expect NOTHING in return, as soon as you do, the mindf*ck begins!! Comes across all of them (us) in a predatory fashion, even called me her "victim" once. Always finds "us" on the internet or WORK.

We ALL must have nice teeth, hair and nails! Loves polished nails. ALL must be "in love."

So many similarities between the N's that we all have become consumed by!

I have thought about this question alot over the years. Because his supply comes in all different nationalities, different cultures, different education levels, different religions, different political views. I couldn't get it, until I finally found this website and figured that they all were supply to him....so he wasn't looking for anyone who matched him long term in terms of nationality, culture, polital beliefs, etc.

He is just casting his movie with different roles. These roles don't need to last for a lifetime.... they only need to last as long as this movie lasts. And then he can recast for the next movie that he produces!!!

And the Roles are::::

Cameo Appearance in a Feature Film: The "girlfriend": The person who plays this role must have a great, athletic, slim body. Nothing else matters about this person, because the only thing he needs the GF for is sex and companionship (someone to go to dinner with a weekend outings with). So even at age 50, he looks for women about the same age as him, slightly younger maybe, but they MUST have a great, slim, athletic body. That is why he said he could never think of me in a "relationship manner". Because I am about 10 pounds overweight. Also, to play this role, it is best if this woman has a lower level of intelligence, doesn't ask alot of questions, and is pretty independent and naive, so that she doesn't figure things out. The girlfriend isn't allowed to be in alot of scenes, so that he is free to play the role of single guy. She just shows up from time to time when a girlfriend is needed and so that people don't think he is odd not attached given all of his spectacular qualities. The way in which this role is cast is that he goes running quite often. He is a marathon runner, and his MO is that he meets these women at marathons and training. These women are VERY athletic. Every sexual relationship that he has had - starting with xwife, was a marathon runner. This is THE only similarity. Every nationality you can imagine, etc, etc. And it seems that the intelligence level drops every year. xwife was very intelligent (but damn she got smart), xfiancee was also very intelligent (but damn she got smart), so now he goes for the lower intelligence. He does not get emotionally close to these. It seems the whore thing.

Best Supporting Actress (me and his other married emotional lover): This role is played by someone who he can have intelligent and deep conversations with because he can't do this with the person cast in the GF role. The role is played by someone who is intelligent, has alot going for her, and is deeply empathetic, loyal, honest, trusting, and genuine. The role is played by someone who he really could have been with long term as we are a match in every way. The role is a lifetime role. He spends much more emotional energy and time with his Supporting Actresses then he does with the GF. However, the role must be played by someone who is IN LOVE with him. It does not work for this role to be played by just any intelligent, empathetic and caring person. They must be IN LOVE! This person is fired from this role if they figure things out - as I did. Oh, and these actresses play the Madonna role. These are the ones who get the Mother's Day cards every year.

Extras: There are various bit parts that are played by whoever he meets on Chemistry.com. The only qualifications for these people are that they must be semi-good looking, good body is desirable, and want to have a good time. And they must have a vagina, because this will come in handy for the love scenes that he will play when things are not going well with the GF.

Barbara - do you think I got it finally??

He likes my hair as long as possible. He once told me " couldn't have too much hair for him"...he also preferred hair, neatly trimmed and manicured in the nether region..."mohawk" over it bare (which in the summer/bathing suit time I would do) He put an end to that but liked no hair anywhere else. (sorry for TMI)

I'm still figuring out the "abnormal eating" habits that seem routine. My N goes through phases of eating homecooked foods prepared by him to phases of dashing out at midnight to McDonalds. I do know he hates grocery shopping and would almost always call me if i wasn't with him (almost to be his support/hold his hand while he ran inside).

I've noticed they all had a pulse.
He likes the athletic bodies,
and the older he gets, the richer he gets...
he keeps trying to move up the totem pole....
but funny thing is this.
He'll never find someone that is as genuine as I was...
and not to sound conceited, but I looked far better than he did too! He might find them younger, bigger boobs, it won't matter.......none will last.
I don't think he'll do the homo thing though......
He is 53, but looks 65. He won't be able to play the game much longer.......
What happens to old narcs? Do they die alone? Or are there lots of people there to witness it and celebrate?