livewpsycobabble's story

For me it's like everyday is a day in court where my N boyfriend is the attorney, judge, and jury and I'm sitting in the defendants chair. The attorney turns what I say around, the judge is yelling contempt of court and the jury is chanting throw the witness out! She is unrealiable and crazy! This happens when my emotional vampire has drained me and I go into I'm not giving you one ounce more mode.

If I try to share my concerns regarding life in general with him I either get the arrogant side or the little boy side. The arrogant side is rage, demeaning and just downright rude. He will say things like; "What don't you understand about that!" or "Your insane!" and then he will dismiss me. When I get dismissed I always say; "Thank you for dismissing me once again." When I get the little boy side he will walk around the house with slumped shoulders, head down, and dragging his feet. He is unable to process things in his mind like any emotionally healthy adult would.

I've done a heck of alot of studying this past year, yes year about lying, cheating, bullies and N's. I have a classic N. I've learned how to "act" and not "act." The times when my energy is up, act happy and non-stop give, give, give to the task I can get the lost little boy to talk. I've gotten information like when he said; "He can only give me little snippets of information" and "He does not feel that a partial truth is a lie." When I'm fed up, drained and have no more to give (like now) I get that very ugly side of him. For 3 days now I've received the arrogance, silence and glares from him. Yes, I put a chink in his armor. I asked him if he were to die of a heart attack next week what would happen to all my things that I moved into his house if his heirs were to freeze the house and everything in it? Reminded him that he would not be around to say otherwise. He made it clear 2 years ago that the house goes to his children (he is early 60's, his children are both in their 30's, I'm 50'ish). I have lived here over 3 long years. I told him I understood that he never had any intentions of taking this relationship to any other level then what its is. Boyfriend, girlfriend. Leaves him free for his cheating side(didn't say that to him). I did say that I was thinking about putting some of my things in storage. CHINK! All he heard was that I'm going on with my life without him. I never said that. I did tell him that it's clear to me that he has little interest in my future so I have to consider my own assets. Double CHINK!
He owns his own business and loves to throw his money at me all of which come with a very high price. Treats me like the hired help. He even admitted to the high price when I got him in one of his raging psyco babble talks. All the while I'm held up to the standards of being His perfect partner. I've refused his money in the past when I learned the high price of his "generosity." He will not take no for an answer so I take it and put it back in his drawer. The really down side to all of this? My own home is under a rental contract until mid year and I lost my job due to the economy.
Thank you! I feel a little better now. Oh! and does anyone have problems with their N not being able to answer a simple yes or no question with a yes or no?