My story is a self-inflicted nightmare. I met my narcissist at work about 13 years ago. I knew he was a player, he bragged about all the women he was with and he was married. Over the years, we grew closer. When I decided to divorce my husband, he was the person there for me, always willing to lend an ear and listen. Little did I know, he was gathering information to use against me in the future. At some point we became involved. He told me every single day how he was leaving his wife and kids. He never loved anyone but me. I was so special, blah blah blah. When judgment day came, and I said get a divorce or it's over, he moved out. Then he moved back in two days. He called to tell me that he couldn't leave, although he did not love his wife (of course not, he did not love anyone) he was going to stay married. I guess this decision did not even warrant being told in person. I was pissed. I sent his wife emails from him professing his love for me and stating how much he could not stand her. I also spoke to her and told her to call me to talk about his "behavior" after she had a change to digest everything. Well she never called. In the meantime, he continued to call me, profess his love, tell me he just needed more time. Fast forward five months when his wife caught him with me - again he throws me under the bus - and stays with her. For the past three years he continued to text, call, etc. saying he knew there were many more chapters in our lives to be lived together. Calling me when he was on vacation with her, late nights from his house. The lies, the manipulation, everything is mind boggling. I have been no contact for a couple of months now, and everything is so clear. It is my hope to figure out myself, not him - that is a lost cause. I need to come to terms with the fact I allowed myself to be abused for so long. I saw his wife on the street last week - looking all put together - like she has the life - yeah she does! She lives with a pathological cheat and liar - who will abuse her for the rest of her life. I lost nothing, I gained my self-respect and hope for a better future. One day I know she will call me and want answers, I feel bad that I had a few years of living a lie, but she has had a lifetime.