So what does your N expect?

Your N expects you to be perfect. By the way, expectations change by the minute.

He expects you to give him endless attention. He expects you to leave him alone.

He expects you to be a sexual object giving into his every kinky thought. He expects you to want zero sex. You must figure out which is which.

He expects you to put up with every imaginable verbal insult, silent treatment, rage episode he can dish out. You must never be hurt by this.

He expects that everything you have or ever will have is his. It’s the price you pay for the privilege of having him in your life.

He expects you to believe his lies. You are never to question him.

He expects you to anticipate and meet his every need. If he slips up he expects you to join in with him blaming yourself or other people.

He expects you to do all manner of things that are beneath him to free up his time for more important and pleasurable things.

He expects you to flatter him in public and point out his achievements to others. You must be act thrilled with any crumbs you receive and praise him enthusiastically. To enhance his image he will treat others better than you. You must not complain about this. Your narcissistic supply will become insufficient over time.

He will expect you to provide him with additional supply sources. You must not expect your N to do anything. You must do everything and then when you do it you must praise your narcissist for reminding you, instructing you and giving you guidance otherwise you would never have been able to do it on your own.

He expects you to overlook infidelity. If he does something illegal he expects you to look the other way.

He expects you to put him on a pedestal. If it suits his purpose he will apologize and promise to do better, but fail to do so.

He expects you to have no needs yourself. Your purpose is to serve him exclusively. You must never complain or fail to perform due to illness or family emergency. And if by some miracle you should do all these he will raise the bar even higher and blame you for not doing even more. These are his rights. You are expected to know it and do it. You are expected to know and accept that he will grow tired of you over time and replace you with a newer supply model.

He expects you to accept this with no demands for financial support for yourself or the children. Should you fail to perform to his expectations at any time you will be devalued and discarded. You are expected to accept that your devaluation and discard is a result of failure on your part. This is his right and he expects it. He is never wrong.

Life is way too short to spend with a mentally-disordered person who only sees you as a self-serving tool for his own purpose. Objectification: Think of your toaster. It worked great for a while, but now the handle keeps acting up, the toast ends up burned or it pops up too quickly and the toast isn’t done. So you replace it. Do you think about the feelings of the old toaster? Of course not. Your N won’t think about your feelings either. To the N you are an object. It’s that simple.

Ns are repetitive. A new narcissistic supply source is valued and idealized by the N. The old one is only kept around only for any residual amusement and possible backup supply. You may have a bird’s eye view of how your replacement is idealized and their new relationship seems to be publically picture perfect. In fact, your N will often go to great lengths to make sure that you see this. This new relationship can last for an indeterminate amount of time. Do yourself a favor and let her have him lock, stock and barrel. That’s a situation you don’t want to know anything about. By the time that relationships breaks down we will want to have moved on – so far away that knowledge of it’s breakdown falls into the ‘who cares?’ category.

I just wanted to share this with everyone, good reading and good reinforcement to give us more strength.