BlueMoon's story

I think thats true... about how these very conniving people are able to get there foot back into the 'proverbial' door when you are at your vulnerable points during your healing process. Even the most resourceful and intellectual woman can be totally overwhelmed by the powerful devices these guys have become very skilled at. How many woman would tell you they were at there 'best' physically, mentally etc when they first met these guys... and yet didn't see the 'red flags'... Its crazy complicated stuff. It takes all your strength to see it for what it is and become capable of standing up to them, thats why Barbara has the 'no contact' advice because they seem capable of 'sucking energy' as if they had a vacuum pipe directly attached to your energy field even if they are not being directly abusive in each moment day to day. I think you have to find a real deep masculine force within you to find a place when you are confident and creative and can 'easily' withstand there energy depleting influences. They wont let you be you; so you can never really be truly yourself around them. It presents a completely impossible situation.. I think you would have to get seriously 'clever' or just down right numb to manage it... Basically Its trickery and most or all of us on here have been hood winked enough times to know that its just not easy to 'retreat' to a place of love and protection within our selves because at one time or another we will all find ourselves presented with the dichotomous situation that these guys present of super privileged kindness and super heart wrenching cruelty. I just agree that we can all be hoodwinked and some of us will be for sometime yet because we have to make the choice to sop being a victim and its pretty complicated to move on from that.. We have to command a real deep power that will take us to the next level. Remember that these guys have probably tried this stuff with woman who were not so easily duped because these guys choose woman who seem to represent the strength they wish to use and suck dry. It seems that If the 'strong' woman has a weak spot, 'an Achilles heal' then he has her... but there would have been few ladies out there who saw them straight away for what they were. What is most interesting is that most of the time, woman who have submitted themselves to this trickery seem to say that they 'knew instinctively' something was not quite right at the start but neglected to heed there own warning signs... But you an become that woman who can hear instinctively her own heart and head and know her own mind well enough to know that she has strength enough to stop these creeps dead in there tracks. We need to know that wont be duped again, so easily anyway... If we can learn anything then is must be to realize that we are capable of being tricked because we look for the best in people and hope that most people are 'feeling and open' but realizing that there are some people out there who are not will help us some way to listening to those inner voices, those instinctive warning signs and we can prevent this form happening twice three times or even more... Stay Safe all.. v x