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I too wish I had found this site sooner.
I am almost divorced from husband #2, married ten years. He wanted the divorce. It is only in the last few weeks that I finally realized who he is and that there was nothing I could have done to change the outcome. What I can't believe is why he stayed with me for a total of 16 years!
My story is long, and eventually I will share it. I am in therapy and it is very helpful, but the pain of this divorce is excruciating.
I am meant to be in a relationship, but I am crushed, burned out, drained and depleted. I am so emotionally bruised that I recoil if a man shows interest in me.
The interesting fact is my soon-to-be-ex wants us to stay friends and he wants to see me when he comes to my city (he still lives in our marital home which is 500 miles away); what a surprise...
Does anybody have ideas about the healing process and how long it will take.
Thank you for the opportunity to share my feelings
Friends or Supply?
August 23, 2009 - 4:15am — James (not verified)The interesting fact is my soon-to-be-ex wants us to stay friends and he wants to see me when he comes to my city (he still lives in our marital home which is 500 miles away); what a surprise...
LOL Heart! For they all want to “stay friendsâ€! I mean how can you abuse manipulate and use someone if you don’t have contact with them? What good is a person to them who refuses to talk and take place in their dance of emotional turmoil of ups and downs? How can you destroy a person’s self-esteem indirectly? Sure they want to stay friend for how else can that person be used as a supply unless they allow it? How else can we be use as an object if the object see's itself as a living caring compassionate individual person and refuses to be used simply as a object? HOW?
http://james-personalitydisorder.blogspot.com/
Great post James. I
August 23, 2009 - 10:23am — better offGreat post James.
I finally realized that I can't stay friends with someone that isn't my friend in the first place.
and...
August 23, 2009 - 4:26pm — Barbara (not verified)and you can't forgive someone who has no remorse or empathy - which makes it an ongoing crime - and no one should forgive an ongoing crime!
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