Logical question here

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#1 Jul 1 - 5PM
justicejones
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Logical question here

It has been a few years since I have been a regular on this forum, things are so different in my life now. I am remarried and doing so well--ten years out d and d'd. Life is good.

I have recently witnessed a histrionic woman in my work place who has brought back a lot of past feelings. As a matter of fact, she has latched on to my sister's ex husband and has been dating him for the last two years. Unfortunately for my sister, she works with this woman as well. She has to deal with this woman on a daily basis rubbing it in her face that she is now with her ex husband. From the get-go, before she even got together with my ex brother in law, I identified her as a histrionic from her tall tails and lies and drama and constant attention she craved as well as different laisons I witnessed in the work place while she was involved with another man. I know her number, she cannot fool me, but since I work with her, I am kind and nice, though I will never show her my cards. She has d and d'ed at least 4 men before my ex brother in law and I know eventually she will d and d him too. She is still in contact with her ex husband of course because they have children together and recently her ex boyfriend she was with before my brother in law reached out to my sister on social media stating that she is always emailing him, sending him pictures, calling him etc and asking who he is with, though supposedly she is happily involved with my brother in law.

The logical question I have is this, why do these disturbed people decide to stay in contact with some of their past people, yet not others? Are some more "valuable" in their eyes to hoover no matter the distance?
I particularly remember that though I was with my ex husband for 8 years and have two children with him, he has nothing to do with us, will not contact us or the kids, (probably cause I have support services on his tail for past child support) when I was in obsessive mode, I tried to friend him on facebook and he never responded, yet he stays friends with the women he was with right after me, who is half way across the country. They had twins together but they were taken away and adopted out for neglect and abuse. He is of course friends with his old lady sugar mama wife he is with now too. Whatever...but anyway, the only time he hoovered me really bad was right after he left the kids and I going to Hawaii, though he had hooked up with the gal he later had twins with. He begged me not to divorce him, and that he was coming back home to do the right thing etc, etc, then he would hoover me when from jail when he would be extradited back to this state for not paying child support, or swing by my house in the middle of the night drunk after being released from jail, wanting to "talk"--the last time being 2013. But since then, when he went back to his home state, not a word...not a word or letter or nothing to me or to our kids or from his family to our kids and of course no child support.

I know that this gal from work chooses to stay in contact with some of her past people probably for an ego trip yet not others she has been with even despite the fact that she is with my ex brother in law and according to her, they are "unbreakable." GAG! So what is your guys' opinion on this question...

Thanks.

Jul 13 - 3PM
Goldie
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The Hoover is Not a Compliement

Aug 5 - 10AM (Reply to #4)
pattylyn
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Goldie right on point

Aug 8 - 2PM (Reply to #5)
Goldie
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Pattylyn

Aug 8 - 3PM (Reply to #6)
pattylyn
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Thank you

Jul 13 - 6PM (Reply to #2)
justicejones
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Goldie, not sure if you

Jul 13 - 6PM (Reply to #3)
justicejones
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I see that you said that