Are you "in love" with or related to a Toxic Narcissist?
Narcissist Recovery Blog
"A brilliant invention for the busy Narcissist on the run." Now we have the text which disappears after reading. The narcissist was jumping for joy the day that app was launched. The players paradise, no longer will there be any evidence in print.
Text Messages, Romantic gestures? Lazy? Or MAJOR Red Flags. TEXTS do not = Love.
A TEXT Message is not a contract, commitment, date, gift, or proof of ones love and devotion.
It is a text. A few seconds out of someone's day.
Most likely they are avoiding OW (which is also you at times) while texting you. Or some other unsavory behavior.
Texting is one of a cheaters/players/Narcissists favorite tools.
Keeps YOU thinking he is connected to you, regardless to what he is actually doing.
Great sex does not necessarily always translate into two people in a deeply loving connection. This is clearly illustrated in the mixed messages, words not matching the actions, type of a relationship with a narcissist.
INTENSITY is often misinterpreted for many of us and perceived as a substitute for INTIMACY (love).
This intensity stems from the tension created in us by the narcissist. This tension is received in our bodies, minds, and hearts, as anxiety, emptiness, and pain triggered by the mind games (push/pull).
***** Greetings to all who land here. It was suggested that the following post I created in September of 2011 be made into a blog. The post was created after discussing the sex issue with a valued member who used to post quite a bit was helping another member who was struggling to understand the "sexual intensity" of the disordered experience. All sorts of lightbulbs clicked when the member offered her observations, and then even more lightbulbs clicked when I shared the observations with our lead moderator Goldie. It is my intention and hope that even more lightbulbs will click for members who read this. You can also access this entire blog and all of the numerous, numerous comments members have left on the 1-3 board. ********
Love (not) spinning, JUST GRINNING!
I simply would not take no for an answer.
On living with abuse and violence from the one you "love."
On the recent media blitz over WHY WE STAY:
The Narcissist's theme song and the Empath's Love Story of HOPE.....
Also a GREAT SONG/theme for the Narcissist's HOOVER, I LOVE you NOW BABY!!!!
Does he? Do Narcissist's love just ONE GIRL? Can a leopard change his spots? Are YOU holding out for this one in a million?
Fooled Around and Fell in Love
Jeffrey Bailey edited the lyrics
I must have been through about a million girls
I love 'em and I leave 'em alone
I didn't care how much they cried, no sir
Their tears left me cold as a stone
But then I fooled around and fell in love
It used to be when I'd see a girl that I like
I'd get out my book and write down her name
But when the grass got a little greener on the other side
I'd just tear out that page
Trust your instincts
Your instincts are your truth.
No, I did not say to trust your addiction.
We cannot trust our addictions, they are not our instincts.
Addictions take us to places of avoidance.
Instincts take us to a place of truth.
Generally when we find ourselves in an addictive state of any nature, food, people, shopping, alcohol, gambling, sex, toxic relationships, and so on, we are in avoidance mode.
Addiction = avoidance of generally pain and truth. Our honest true feelings and what we see.
The truth is too painful so we become addicted to avoid the truth.
Often it is said of addiction, is that the person has on their running shoe's.
And what are they running from?
A Manipulative Narcissist's Dream Target/Man/Woman
Traits a Predator is looking for in YOU: A Narcissist Shopping List.
Arming yourself from the predators which live among us.
I have worked with hundreds of clients now, from all walks of life and have composed typical profile's of the most likely candidates to be selected (targeted) by Narcissists.
Finding the perfect target/supply for a Narcissist is not an easy task. This is why the are always on the lookout for potential new victims. Supply who does not know what they are all about. Fresh clean slates.
Many are great supply in the beginning, yet as they catch on and wise up, they become a drag for the Narcissist. Along with the fact that Narcissists grow easily bored.
The Narcissist Recovery Support Groups on The Path Forward are worth their weight in Gold
The Support Group gives you 12 weeks, 24 hours, of the latest information, education, and recovery techniques available today.
I have years of experience working with survivors of Narcissist trauma, confusion, and abuse. I have worked with hundreds of women and men globally with the one on one, personalized sessions, as well as in the Support Group setting.
I work with all levels of recovery, from a few days out, struggling to get out, to those still suffering months and years out.
Group members range from just beginning to understand, to months out, still struggling with PTSD symptoms, understanding it, and slips with no contact.
We draw people to us
When WE have unfinished business.
It's the nature of the energy and power within us.
Did you ever notice how you run into people or hear from them when you either were thinking of them or have a "need" or desire?
It's the same thing when your time with them is "truly" over. I'm not talking about them being with someone else, I'm talking about you being done.
When we are done with someone, finished to our core, there is no longer a need or desire to draw them to us.
I often will see someone I used to know one last time, I'll run into them and we both realize, there's nothing there, nothing left.
I call those encounters, closure encounters. You know you have come full circle.
I'm very happy to be sharing a guest blog from Shahida Arabi on the important topic of victim-blaming as I believe SELF-COMPASSION to be paramount to our recovery from a narcissist. Please share and help others find their path to recovery!
Shahida Arabi is a graduate student at Columbia University and the author of The Smart Girl's Guide to Self-Care, a bestselling Kindle book also available in print. Her interests include psychology, sociology, education, gender studies and mental health advocacy. You can check out her new blog, Self-Care Haven, for topics related to mindfulness, mental health, narcissistic abuse and recovery from emotional trauma.
The Smart Girl's Guide to Self-Care --> http://www.amazon.com/Smart-Girls-Guide-Self-Care-ebook/dp/B00JK86OAI/