Profile Info

Age Range

30-40

My Story

I am not trying to reopen old wounds but to find closure to what is the most difficult emotional challenge for me. I need to have this to be able to move on in my life. This is not meant to be confrontational. I need understanding and closure. Perhaps you will do me the the honour of being reflective and not defensive as is your custom. I will not dwell on what I consider your material failings. Like the reluctannce to make a paradigm shift in your efforts to make yourself independent. I understand but do not accept as an excuse the fact the your nurturing has some what neutered your ability to self sustain.I am concerned.with your ability to self destruct Let me set out my emotional stall. I am of the belief that you premeditated your involvement with me and have been very calculated all the way. I don't want to believe this of you but the evidence is leaning in this direction. I am sure that you consider yourself to be reasonable rational and sincere. I think if you canvassed opinion of those you consider close you will find you are in the minority. I can't seem to understand why you have treated me with more evil and. Disrespect than even the people I have been wicked to. I can't understand why you seem always in a hurry to justify yourself . I can only assume that you either consider me an idiot or hate me. It is not enough for you to say I don't feel this way. Your actions have been nothing but the opposite. I am trying hard not to hate you The fact is that I love you. And for this I hate my self.I am weak to you and you continue to abuse that. I know it's in but in a moment you will meet some other man that will look after you and will become more prominent in my daughters life. This is my biggest pain. You have no I dea . I will rather die than think of it . But off course this matters not to you as I have pretty much served my purpose. I just want to understand why you chose me to inflict such pain.

Email i recieved a while ago from my Narc. We have adaughter togerther and I must say he does take care of us financially. He always sucks me back in. Know he has started beating me up and then apologizing saying it was my fault. He is always accusing me of the things he is doing.

Gender

Female

History

Member for

1 year 24 weeks